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Showing posts from September, 2014

Why Every Leader Has to Deal with Bears and Lions

Leaders have to face various obstacles along the way to our destiny in order to prepare us for the greatest things we will do.

I Samuel 17 is about David facing Goliath and in verses 34-37 it talks about him killing the lion and bear in preparation to face his giant, Goliath.

David had a great destiny before him in not only becoming the greatest worship leader/psalmist who ever lived, but also a king and a man after God’s own heart.

David wasn’t sadistic, and he certainly wasn’t killing just to kill. The lion and bear were coming in to steal a lamb from his father’s flock. He had to protect the flock. And so he destroyed the lion and the bear.

When I went first into the ministry, I never realized how much I would deal with bears and lions. I just expected to love people. And I imagined, they would just love me back. I was quite surprised that much of my work would involve warfare. Not only did I get tired, but sometimes I thought I wouldn't survive the struggle.

In vers…

5 Reasons to Stop Rehashing a Setback

People's failures teach us as much if not more than their successes.

One of my greatest failures happened because I refused to use one of my greatest strengths.



Resilience: My Personal Uzi

I've always been resilient.
Had to be.

It's a story bigger than one blog post.
The crux of it is, I learned pretty early in life that I could be resilient or die.

My former boss used to joke that while other employees were complaining about something that happened, I had already formulated a 10-point strategy to come back from whatever took place and was passionately trying to sell everyone on it.



Why Some Leaders Don't Move Forward

A lot of leaders stay down too long after a hit. Staying immobilized for too long impedes acomeback.

If something bad happens in the course of my job, I usually blow off steam for no longer than a few hours. Then, I pray about it and work hard on quickly creating and announcing a new plan -- that day. The goal is move forward rapidly, to make whate…

3 Choices Happy Women Make

1) Happy women have standards and keep them. Not only does it show that they aren't desperate but they spare themselves a tragic choice by having lowered them. 

2) Happy women reject the lie that finding "the perfect man" will make them happy.Please stop with the Facebook posts about how this new man who is your soul mate has met your every need. I write this not to man bash. I love men, especially the one I'm married to. Although there are great guys on the planet, they don't exist to fulfill our every need. Only God can do that. There are so many lessons we can learn from Eve, and one is that and one is that even with the "perfect man" a woman is still not satisfied.  Men are a blessing in our lives but whenever we become dependent upon them for our happiness we are in for a fall.

3) Happy women realize that a bad mood or attitude is not going to change anything for the better. Happy women don't try to bring change through negative emotions expres…

I'm Not Lonely Anymore

Have you ever been surrounded by lots of people, yet felt like the loneliest person in the world? 

Me too.

I've heard lots of people say they have, including many ministers. 

The issue isn't whether we're surrounded by people, it's about a heart-connection.
Kindred spirits. 
Understanding on a deeper level. 

We do need community -- and God has created us that way. But it's not community that I'm thinking about today. 

I used to feel an ache as a woman in ministry because although I was surrounded by  people, few if any knew the weight of that which I carried.  The issue wasn't whether I could find someone to go out for coffee with. There were those who gave invitations, but sometimes I didn't feel the level of trust or understanding to share with them. 
What God showed me was that I needed to reframe the issue of loneliness.  

I saw loneliness as a bad thing. 
A horrible thing. 
Something that needed to be fixed. 

And I thought people were the only solutio…

Are You Getting Rough Around the Edges?

A few weeks ago I woke up and was so irritable I was banging stuff around on the counter top in the bathroom while I was getting ready for the day. Even the dogs were steering clear.

Yep, I have days like that. Just keepin' it real.
I am not a Pentecostal Mother Teresa.

My husband asked me what was wrong and I confessed that I was angry at the lack of solitude to recharge. I couldn't remember the last time aside from reading my Bible or praying that I had  any quiet time to refresh.

The previous day we had a few hours off and instead of standing up for my need for solitude, I followed Larry's suggestion to spend some time with friends. This wasn't his fault. I never spoke up and just went along with his suggestion without ever bringing up how I was feeling.

He couldn't fix what was wrong because he didn't even know what was wrong. 

Extroverts vs. Introverts

A lot has been circulating the internet recently about the differences between introverts and extroverts…

Guess What Day It Is?

Yep, it's Wednesday. Hump day. Mid-week. Comes every week, and for me it's a church day.

Contrary to what a lot of church members may believe, their pastor or pastor's wife doesn't usually feel like coming to church on a Wednesday night. We are not super human. We are just like anyone else in that we have worked all day, and we are absolutely exhausted. In addition to work we have family needs to meet and so much else going on in our personal world. Our flesh says, "Go home, take a bath, get your PJ's on, and put your feet up..."

My flesh never tells me to go to church. Never.

Thankfully I tell my flesh who's boss most of the time.

It never fails, I am so blessed for gathering with my church family for this mid-week boost.

My body may be bone-tired when I walk in those doors, but soon my spirit is so lifted!



I crave the worship, the prayer, the Word, the fellowship.

I always leave uplifted and glad I made the effort to be there with my church family.

5 Ways to Increase the Joy in Your Life

1) Choose joy.

Yes, this is something you determine!  Choosing joy doesn't mean you ignore tragedy, trauma or challenges. It's about making a decision to choose joy despite obstacles.

Choosing joy even in the midst of struggle is important because the Bible says, "the joy of the Lord is your strength." (Nehemiah 8:10) Especially in the throes of problems, we need strength more than ever. Making a decision to choose joy even in trials brings us greater strength which in turn helps us with issues we face.

That's easier said than done..." you think.

I agree.

And I'm not naive.

I say this from the perspective of one who has overcome what therapists term, "complex trauma, significant loss and complicated grief."

Yes, choosing joy is possible, even when going through all that.

2) Be thankful.


 1 Thessalonians 16-18 says,"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus."

We…