I Want to Change This About Me
Where did the strange piece of "wisdom" originate that the things we hate most in others are the things we are guilty of ourselves?
Time and again I've tried to reconcile this statement, but just can't find the truth in it. It's not that I haven't looked really hard or dared to be honest enough with myself.
The things I get most upset about in others are things I don't struggle with. Therefore, compassion doesn't come easy in those instances.
When I'm guilty of something I see others doing, I tend to rationalize their behavior. I do this because I understand how hard it is for them to change in that area. I can readily wrap my arms around them and say, "I've been there, and I know it's hard," or "it's not so bad..."
Whether dealing with a common mistake, or a sin in others -- if it's not one of my weaknesses, I tend to struggle in mustering up compassion.
I desire to change that. I want to have amazing compassion, not just on some people but all people.
For instance, I have always lacked compassion on people who don't show up somewhere because they oversleep. I'm the person who sets three alarms. I've always set multiple alarms, since the time I was responsible for myself. I don't ever trust one alarm, "just in case" it doesn't go off for some reason. And before I had my cell phone to wake me up, I always had a battery back up in case the electricity went out.
This is one example of something I do very well, almost flawlessly my entire life. I do not hate this in others because I fail at it myself. I succeed at it, therefore I have a hard time relating to those who don't.
At the same time, I have a lot of compassion on emotional eaters. Or those who struggle with anger.
But darn it, if they can't set an alarm, I just wanna choke 'em.
It is a struggle to have compassion on those who make different mistakes than I do, or sin differently than I do.
I'm working on that. How about you?