Saturday, September 22, 2012

How to Increase Your Chances of Getting Help


Everyone wants something.


I've noticed the majority of people are clueless about how to get help. And some, when instructed, will insist on continuing to do things their own way which does them no favors.

If you want to receive someone's attention, and ultimately their favor -- communicate with them in the manner that they best receive requests. There are no guarantees, but success is much more likely. 

A previous boss loved texts. If I wanted their attention and response I could text immediately and they promptly responded.  I hate texts. If someone texts me, I groan. I answer in as few words as possible. And, I normally check my texts once or twice a day...not all day. But if I'm dealing with someone who prefers texts and I need something, I know I need to make a personal adjustment. Because I'm the one asking.

I am easy to reach through e-mails, Facebook messages, etc. This would be my number one method of communication where I really flow in helping people. 

I realize everyone doesn't operate that way. And that's why if I need something I don't expect them to meet me there. I find out their sweet spot and approach them in the method that  most entreats them. Because I'm the one asking -- not them.

If they aren't a phone person and prefer face to face meeting, I set up one at their convenience.
If they love texts, I text them.
If they prefer e-mails, I do that.
If they want a phone call, I approach them that way.
If I'm not sure -- I ask them!

There's a well known author I have gotten some personal advice from in the past year. They let me know they are more than happy to help me, but requested I keep my e-mails to two to three sentences. They told me they don't have time to read anything longer than that, from anyone. I keep my questions to two or three sentences and they get back to me promptly with great advice I appreciate. I've found the key to so much is respecting the person whose help you're asking.

You see, the responsibility doesn't fall upon the one who's giving help, it falls upon the one asking for the help. So many don't understand this principle.And they repeatedly get frustrated and wonder why help is elusive.

Will this approach require you to shift gears in how you communicate when you need something? Yes. But the point is, if it's you that needs something, it's you that has to do the shifting.

Will you always get what you want? No. Nobody does. And quite frankly nobody should. Who gets their own way all the time? But meeting others in the way they prefer gives you a lot better chance of gaining assistance.

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