Thursday, June 07, 2012

What to do when you get rejected

The life of a writer can be really rollercoasterish (I'm aware that's not a word) and if you let it get to you, it could put you permanently between a case of Prozac and a dozen donuts. Lucky for me Dunkin Donuts is less than a mile away.

Remember yesterday when I talked about there always being a next? Well, I know what I'm talking about, from experience. They say a man with an experience is never at the mercy of a man with an argument. I think that works for a woman too.  I'm sure there's always a next.

As sure as Chick-fil-A has the best iced tea...

As sure as this presidential election has shaped up to be the lamest ever...

I'm confident, absolutely sure, 100% positively certain there is a next. Are you breathing? Then there's something for you to do next.  You're never, ever through. Even when you die, you're not through.

No, that wasn't a typo. You aren't through when you're physically dead, because you will live forever, in one of two places. Everyone lives forever -- the only question for each person is where. And, the choice is up to you.

So, yesterday I got a rejection letter.

I get them all the time. All writers do.

Kathryn Stockett's The Help was turned down 60 times before it became a bestseller.

The first Chicken Soup for the Soul book got a whopping 140 rejections!

Gone With the Wind was rejected 38 times!

And I was rejected yesterday. 

As many times as I get rejection letters, there's still at least a slight pang when I read them. You never totally just get used to being rejected.

I did what I always do when I get rejected. I kept going.

I sat down at the computer shortly thereafter and wrote yesterday's post about the next thing, because as sure as I'm writing it for you, I'm writing it for me too. Because I really believe this stuff I write.

 No isn't forever. It's just one person's no in a sea of potential yesses.

 The key is to stay surrendered to the Lord and trust Him with our lives. We have to accept a no as something allowed by God. The no makes it possible to receive a coming yes. (If you're already over-committed to other things when a door opens, how will you be free to accept?)

Sometimes it takes a little bit of time for a yes to arrive, and sometimes it takes a lot. Yesterday it just took a little.

I received an invitation a few hours after the rejection.  A delightfully unexpected open door! One I never applied for or sought. 


I've been asked to be the relationship advice columnist for a Tampa newspaper called Insight Tampa.  This paper is distributed throughout the Tampa Bay area, but the circulation is primarily in the business district downtown. After reviewing several previous copies of the publication, I'm guessing much of their readership are young professionals.

The focus of my regular column will be on providing advice to readers who have emailed their questions concerning dating, marriage, sex, parenting, friendship,etc. This is not a Christian newspaper - and it has been made clear to me that this is not a faith column or a place to give answers directly from the Bible. However, I am able to promote my blog! And you know what that means. ;)

All true wisdom originates with the Word of God and although I may not actually be citing scripture in the advice column, Godly values will come through in my writing. And I'm excited about the possibility of Insight Tampa readers coming here to the blog where I do share things from a faith perspective.

The first question I've been asked to address in my column concerns the issue of "friends with benefits". As you can see, I have my work cut out for me. (Thanks for your prayers!)

A while back my dear friend Susanne Cox gave me a word of encouragement that God had gifted me to be a voice and not an echo. That stuck with me.

I never imagined that I would have the opportunity to be a voice through writing a relationship advice column, but here it is. Yes, Lord. Thank you for trusting me with this.

My friend, in the hours ahead, you may get some rejections. Can I just remind you that open doors are in your future beyond them?

Keep going. 

 
 p.s. if you aren't sure where you're going to end up for eternity when you are physically dead, and want to talk about it, I'm here. E-mail me, and let's get it settled. You can be at peace about this.

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