Wednesday, September 07, 2011

What to do when people keep trying to tell you who you are

Do you have the courage to live out your identity and calling even if it isn't accepted by others?  I'd like to suggest one of my personal techniques today which is to INTRODUCE YOURSELF to people who already THINK they know you.  Warning:  they may rebuff this attempt but that doesn't mean it's not successful!   

Yesterday my friend Sandy Aguilar, leader of IMPACT Leadership Resources had this to say on her Facebook page:  "What's it take to really change???  Repetition, repetition, repetition...repeat the new you that you choose...whether anyone else does or not." 

I believe the major key is in the last six words of that quote -- "WHETHER ANYONE ELSE DOES OR NOT."

Did you ever have someone in your life who keeps wanting to put you back where you were?  To who you USED to be?  To old habits you USED to have?  To old things you USED to do?   For some reason they try to keep you in the past.

I lost a friend that way a while back.  They were really unhappy with some decisions I made, and didn't accept how God has shaped me for my next level.  I had a choice - to keep letting them pull me back to my old place, or take a stand.  I had to literally say to them, "Maybe you haven't met me, so let me introduce myself." Unfortunately that introduction was the end of our relationship.  Actually  I thought they were going to go postal.  I'm surprised I got out of the room without a black eye!  But it was the best thing that could have ever happened.  I had a choice -- to slip back to the old me, even if it was just around them so as to make them comfortable to continue our relationship, or fully grasp my identity.

When something is God given, you have to ask yourself what you are going to value more -- what God has designed for your life, or the opinion of a friend or family member. 

Walking away when someone doesn't accept who you are isn't easy but just remember at the same time you walk away from something you also walk toward something else.  Make sure what you're walking toward is worth it and indeed God-ordained and not just the fact that you ate too much pizza last night.

Repeat the new you that you choose...whether anyone else does or not.  Introduce yourself and let the chips fall where they may.  You may also want to be prepared to duck, or at least take a self defense class or two.  :)

2 comments:

Wendy said...

Good word, Deanna!!
We need to rise up as women of God and realize who we are in Christ, even if it flies in the face of who others say we should be!
Preach it girl!

Russell Faux said...

Love this! WOW. As God changes us it can really be hard for our friends to accept. Its not that they are evil or something but I think they unknowingly wish to make us stay the way we were. Maybe sometimes the changes actually convict them and make them feel uncomfortable. We all need to give plenty of room to allow our friends to Grow and even expect it. We all should be constantly transforming as we allow God to have his way.