Skip to main content

True Church Stories - #36

It's been a while since I've posted any of my "true church stories".  This is a running series here on the blog and if you want to catch up on the 35 stories that preceded this, just go here.  Some friends tell me it's some of the funniest material they've ever read. Are they just humoring me? You decide.

So today the thought came to me it's been a while since I've shared one of these and I thought some of my readers might enjoy a chuckle on this manic Monday.  This story actually comes from an AG sectional minister's  meeting years ago here in Tampa.  Now let me say that if you live in Tampa and are sharing that  you are a resident of such I have been informed by many that the proper way to introduce oneself would be as a "Tampanian."  Evidently a certain minister's wife was not informed of this fact, bless her heart.

On the evening of this minister's meeting the person hosting the meeting asked everyone present to go around the room and state our names and where we were originally from.  When it came to this dear pastor's wife she said, "Good evening everyone!  My name is Vera, and I've been a tampon all my life."

If you think it was hard for me to control myself, you're right.  My husband remained rather composed but another of our staff members and myself almost had to leave the room we were laughing so hard. 

Comments

Kathy Butryn said…
Now, that's funny!
Love it! You tell the best stories!
Thank you! :) It's one of my favorite pastimes telling funny true stories.

Popular posts from this blog

I'm Just Being Transparent...

This year at the Stronger Conference, a young minister stopped me as I was walking out of the room at the conclusion of a workshop and she said, "I want to tell you something..." (I was all ears.) She said, "Do you notice how many of the speakers this weekend are saying, "Now, I'm just being transparent when I tell you..." or "I'm just keepin' it real..." I nodded yes. In fact, I mentioned that I was one of those speakers. I think I probably said a few times in both my keynote message and my workshop that I was just "keepin' it real."

After I affirmed that yes, I had noticed that -- she said, "Do you know why they have to do that? They do it...and you do it, because so many people don't keep it real. So many in leadership aren't transparent, Deanna. That's why all these people speaking here feel an urge to declare their transparency.." I let her know that usually when I say, "I'm just keeping …

This Could Have Ruined Everything... (But It Didn't!)

No one would ever guess what happened to me this weekend in Jacksonville, Florida...so I'm going to tell you. :)


As I was preaching at the Fearless Tour at New Hope Assembly of God this weekend,  I got choked up, literally. For probably 2-3 minutes I coughed profusely and greatly struggled. Then I drank some water and kept preaching. Everyone was gracious to give me a few moments to get my bearings. If you were there, you'll remember it!

What no one realized at the time was that I swallowed a bug that flew right in while I was preaching! So disgusting! I said nothing because I was at a point in the sermon where I was really connecting and I knew if I said, "I swallowed a bug," everyone would either laugh profusely or be really concerned, or start feeling sorry for me.  And at that point whey wouldn't be thinking about the message anymore, but the fact that I had just swallowed a bug. They would then imagine what it would be like, and feel grossed out which is u…

What To Do First to Make a Profit

Today on Seth Godin's blog, he said:

It's tempting to decide to make a profit first, then invest in training, people, facilities, promotion, customer service and most of all, doing important work. In general, though, it goes the other way.
Yes, it does. If you are waiting to make a profit before you do these things, in my experience you're  not going to make a profit. So many organizations, ministries and churches are struggling with financial issues. I know your pain. As anyone who follows our story knows, our ministry was in a ton of debt four years ago when I came on as director.  Since that time, we've gotten out of debt and turned a profit every year.  God has done amazing things through out team, for which we give Him the glory!

I find that what Seth is saying here is absolutely true, with one disclaimer. For Christian leaders, spiritual disciplines must always be first. Before we started investing and training and all of that, seeking God for his blessing and…