It's still so unfair, and maddening, but we choose to live and learn from one of the best...

It's hard to believe that yesterday was the one year anniversary of my friend's death.  She was a friend to many of my friends in the ministry who read this blog.  They all join me in grieving this tragic loss.  Deborah was a pastor's wife - and a minister in her own right, a powerful woman of God, and she was tragically murdered.  If you are a new reader to my blog you can go back and read about it here and here.

I still open my phone and see her texts and private tweets and can't bear to delete them.  One morning I was getting ready for church and picked up my phone to check a text that had just come in.  My finger slipped on my phone and went back to some old ones by accident and up came her name and text.  For a brief second my heart skipped a beat.  I thought, "What?! Could it be?  Someone made a mistake..they were wrong, she's not gone!"  My mind raced wondering how in the world she was texting then I realized it was an old message.  She was...still gone.  Still in heaven.  Leaving three precious children and a host of other family and friends behind, missing her like crazy.

My favorites were these texts:

"I'm back and dangerous for His Kingdom!!" 

"Hi are so on my mind.  It's 4:30 pm my time and I'm praying for joy and strength for you my dear precious dolla..."

Dolla was her favorite name that she called all of her friends.  She always took the time to speak what was on her heart and she will always be dangerous for the Kingdom because her words live on in her blog posts that she left behind.

One of her favorite things to say was, "I used all the crayons in my box!"  It was her way of saying that she utilized everything that God gave her to be as creative for Him as possible and maximize each moment.

I am choosing to use all of the crayons in my box and still learning life lessons from a friend who has passed on but is still teaching all who knew her (and many who didn't) through the powerful words she left behind.

I made a facebook group that has served as a place to honor her memory.  Many people who don't know her have become a member on the page just as a support to those of us who knew her, and also to learn from her life from the things various writings others have posted from her blogs and such.  If you would like to become a friend/member of this group just go to "A Tribute to Deborah Hosmer Meyer" on facebook.  I'd be honored if you stop by and become a member, and so would Deborah.  She'd be delighted to know people are still learning lessons from things that God showed her while she was on this earth.

Everyone, please continue to pray for the children, extended family, and all concerned.  It's a year later but just yesterday I received prayer requests from family members who describe the pain as still "unbearable" and they are craving the comfort and peace only God can give.

Miss you, dolla...