When I have gone through hard times or circumstances particularly when I didn't ask for it and felt I was undeserving I often asked why. Now I've come to think, "why not"? It's much more comfortable for us to go through life in denial that we'll be in the group of people that certain things happen to, until they happen. The truth is that the bible says the rain falls on the just and the unjust. Sometimes horrible things happen to people who don't deserve it. What makes any of us think we will be exempt from hardship? All of the greats of the bible went through difficulties.
I now ask WHAT. What do you want me to learn from this, Lord? What can I do to bring glory to You through this? What might happen through this circumstance to bring attention to Your greatness? What will this do to possibly propel me into my next level? Keep in mind that the set backs the people in the bible went through were their divine set ups for promotion!
I also stopped asking why other people did or didn't do certain things. In cases where they commit sinful acts, asking why never gets you any closer to understanding because sin doesn't make sense. Satan is the author of confusion therefore seldom will sinful behavior on the part of others make any sense either.
Asking why never got me anywhere. Asking what has been quite productive. I encourage anyone to try tweaking this line of questioning in your own life and see things move forward in the right direction.