True Church Stories - #31
Back in November my friend Candy asked me why I was still wearing my boots all the time when they were obviously on their last legs, pardon the pun. (They were in very poor shape. Max has even chewed on them, bless his heart. However I had not gotten around to replacing them and in wintertime I wear my high heeled black boots with almost everything on a daily basis.) I was delighted on Christmas Eve to have friends Candy and Sue corner me after communion and say, "we have a gift for you..." and when I opened it among other things there were a new pair of high heeled black boots from Charlotte Russe. Only one thing...although my size, these particular boots were a little bit too tight. Being that I want to wear them all the time during this time of the year I knew if they weren't really comfortable -- I wouldn't. So, I said, "can we check for one size bigger?" Candy said she'd be glad to and took them back to exchange.
So, I've been waiting for them. And, I've continued to wear my old boots while I've been waiting. Saturday night Candy called me and said, "I got your boots exchanged and I'm bringing them to church tomorrow!" So I was all excited and said, "Okay, here's the plan -- I'm wearing the old ones to church but when I get there we'll trade them out for the new ones."
She brought the boots yesterday morning and I took off my old ones and put the new ones on. She was in the back room with me as I was putting them on and helped me take the tissue paper out of them. There was a buckle on the outside on the bottom with tissue paper wrapped around it and she reached down and ripped those off and said, "they look great!" and I wore them to teach my class at 9:30. After class as I was standing in the side room getting ready to go up on the platform to lead worship she says to me, "Hey, I think you can roll those boot cuffs up and wear them up even higher on your knee. Try it." So I did and she goes, "Oh my gosh, that looks awesome...wear them that way!!!" So I did. But we only glanced at the front of the boots and we never noticed that up high on each side was another buckle, also with tissue paper wrapped around. I was wearing a dress that was shorter and you could see the entire boot. Service started and I went up on the stage for worship.
Fast forward to the altar call. The tissue paper is still on there unbeknownst to me. I go over to the keyboard and the rest of the band comes up. My son Dustin is standing beside me and glances over to me to find out what we're playing for altar time. He momentarily glances down and sees my boots and he whispers, "Mom...ummmm...you've got a napkin or toilet paper stuck to your boot." He comes over and tears the tissue off of the boots. Then he glances over and says, "Oh my gosh, it's on the other boot too..." So at this point the whole band notices it and I am not sure whether they think I have toilet tissue stuck to my boots or that I was just nerdy enough to leave the tissue wrap from the factory on my boots when wearing them the first time. But whatever -- they were all laughing so hard, so much so that I was scolding them saying, "Guys, stop laughing, we need to get serious and play this altar call..." and Dustin was looking at me totally embarrassed like, "Oh my gosh Mom, you look like a total nerd... get that stuff off your boots" and I shot him a stern glance and said, "Don't worry about it, it's not going to kill anybody, just start playing the song and we'll get it off after the service..."
As soon as I stepped off the stage before greeting the visitors I ripped the tissue paper off and thought, "ugh, I really did look like a nerd, but who cares."