Wednesday, September 01, 2010

What would I want if it were me?

The past few days I've been ...

Following up from Sunday...
Getting about 10 church projects done...some small, some larger...
Doing engagements for NextJob...
Keeping things going at home... (ya know, food, basic cleaning, dog care, yada yada)
Working on special things in honor of my friend who passed away...

Last night I was up late writing letters to people  -- some I know, and many more that  I don't, informing them about Deb's page and what we're doing for her.  I have a very early morning appointment and needed sleep but I kept telling myself, "one more letter...just one more" and then I'll sleep.  [sigh]  I am feeling driven because I think, "what would I want if this had happened to me?"  I would want someone to tell my friends, someone to care for my children, someone to verbalize what was important to me...someone to pass on the message that I tried to share while on earth.  Deb shared so many wonderful insights with the world, and I want to make sure people don't forget them!  Her life counts for so much but if people don't know where to find her writings, or her blog, or her page...they won't be blessed by it.  I feel responsible to do something.  And it's not a "burden", in fact as busy as I am, when I'm writing these letters or posting her blog, it's cathartic for my emotions.  In a helpless situation, I feel like I'm "doing something" albeit small.   

Pastor Lisa and I are also getting our heads together about a possible memorial service for her in the USA.  We are considering doing this at the next Unstoppable Conference.  So, those of you who are part of the Pastoring Partners Network, message me about your thoughts on that.  Thanks!

Yesterday I spoke with Deb's daughter Jenni-lee, and found out more details, also prayed for Jenni-lee and the family and expressed our love and care.  Knowing details more doesn't make it easier...it makes it harder in many ways.  There's the frustration of "not knowing" and then when some of the blanks are filled in you think, "mmmkay, that doesn't really make me feel any better either..."  Pastor Lisa and I are dealing with anger, but that's to be expected at this stage. 

My way of dealing with frustration right now is doing for someone else what I'd want done for me.  And really, that's only biblical.  Do unto others...

3 comments:

Ruth said...

I'm not part of the PPN, but I'd like to make a request. If you have a memorial service for Deborah, could you possibly ustream the service so that the world could also view? Thanks for all you are doing, Deanna. You are a true "sistah" and servant of the King!!

Melissa said...

Ruth you should join the PPN! It's a great place to bounce ideas off other women in ministry and a safe place to ask for prayer or just vent. The women that are part of PPN are very supportive and loving. It literally saved me emotionally when we were going through some very tough times. I have found a group of women that I cherish through PPN!

Deanna...UNSTOPPABLE :) YAY! I am praying God will make a way for me to attend again next year! It will be a priority naturally :) How could I not be there...it was life changing! Plus the opportunity to spend time with you ... oh yea it is a priority!

Deanna said...

Yes Ruth, come right on over and join PPN! You are welcome there. (www.pastoringpartners.com)

And yes, I had already planned to live stream the service. :) Great minds think alike.