Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Have you lost friends?

A friend of mine recently posted on their facebook status, asking if anyone else had lost old friends over a social networking site. It appears that they had lost long time friends they have known over many years after just recently becoming friends on a social networking site. Evidently the friends discovered more about them than they previously knew. It was nothing illegal or inappropriate, just the same thing most all of us share such as status updates, foods we're eating, movies we're seeing, places we're going, photos, blog posts on various subjects not to mention a political view or two. After the "friends" post a nasty dissenting comment or two, they "de-friend" the person or become such an argumentative nuisance, they wish they did! My friend was a bit disheartened that this happened to them, yet not enough to stop being exactly who they are. I have other pastor friends who have actually lost people from their church through involvement with a social networking site. That is becoming more common. As much as it unites people and helps you keep in touch with folks in the church, it can also create "drama" that is just unbelievable. Who could ever imagine even a few short years ago that a pastor would get a call of concern over what somebody had posted on their facebook? [sigh] A friend of mine who is a pastor's wife told me yesterday that she and her husband completely deleted their facebook accounts recently because people who are disgruntled and have left their church are now posting negative remarks on people's pages about them and their church. How immature and sad!

I understand all this as I've had similar things to all the above happen to me on occasion. Perhaps this occurs because through a social networking site people hear from us every day who used to not really hear from us any other time than an occasional card, phone call, wedding, funeral, holiday, occasional e-mail, or family reunion. Now those same people hear something from us everyday, so there is a greater chance we will say something they take issue with. One little status blurb that you think the recent health care bill is scarier than any book Stephen King has ever written can unleash a plethora of nasty comments and send your third cousin or your old friend you met years ago at summer camp packing. Delete, delete, delete they go.

I have to confess, I don't mind. I figure first of all, if they are that shallow to get upset over the fact that I posted in my status that I took my daughter to see Twilight or that I shared a swimsuit photo, let them go. Second, if they find out more about me and that leads them to not want to be in relationship, hasn't it served to more help me figure out who is important in my life and who my real friends should be?

Some consider it hurtful...I consider it a helpful, time saving service.

5 comments:

Leanne said...

Don't you just want to tell people that junior high ended a long time ago?!?!?!

Deanna Shrodes said...

Yes I do!!

Amy said...

I've lost FB friends for one reason or another. I really don't care. It's really their issue, not mine. Even still...its pretty sad.

Anonymous said...

My doctor is also my friend from high school and has a facebook. From time to time my husband will read what she has written and he'll say to me "this is your doctor"?. But he needs to remember that she's normal like everyone else and has a life too outside of being a doctor. She's a great person, with a wonderful personality and likes to have fun.

DaNella Auten said...

I purposefully have not invited my new boss to be my friend on facebook even though I know she has one, I want to keep work seperated from home some...