Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Respect for other women




Elizabeth Edwards is one classy woman. I knew she was going to be on Oprah last week in an exclusive interview and so I Tivo'd it to make sure I didn't miss it. I blogged about the Edwards situation a while back here when John admitted his affair.

I have even more respect for Elizabeth after this interview. She's a very intelligent woman and not only is Rielle Hunter ("the other woman") not in her league, but she's not even worthy of playing the same game.

This article quoted one of the best things Elizabeth said in the interview:

"There is no excuse for women to do this," said Elizabeth, who has terminal breast cancer. "Women need to have respect for other women. You can't just knock on that door and say, 'you're out, I'm in'" added the mother of three. "If you admire that life, you can't just take it. Build your own."

I couldn't agree more with this quote.

Like any man who cheats, John Edwards is equally guilty in this matter of infidelity. However, aside from men's culpability, women need to have more respect for other women in this world. What is another woman's is not theirs to take, plain and simple -- and they should know better.

Many times a woman will admire and desire another woman's life. However, they are sadly mistaken to think that if they were to take the wife's place they too would have the same life. Homewreckers don't realize the work that the wife has put into that home, that man, those children. Without the man's wife in the equation, the wonderful "life" they are coveting would not be the same -- not even close. A home it largely what it is because a woman has made it so. Take her out of it and it's not such a great home anymore. Second, if they want the kind of life they see, Elizabeth is right -- let them go build it on their own, not steal someone else's.

Years ago there was a lady in the church who was intent on having my husband. She went after him in no uncertain terms and declared openly her desire for him. I shared the whole story here in this blog post. Basically I told the woman if she ever came near my husband again I'd break her legs. One of the reasons Larry was upset with me for doing that was because he said none of it mattered because he had zero interest in her and found her completely unattractive. I told him I disagreed -- that she still needed to be dealt with because of her disrespect for me. I had to deal with the fact that she would be so brazen to even think it was okay to try to take what is mine. Whether Larry was attracted to her was another issue entirely.

Elizabeth has made a very important point in this interview -- a lot of cheating out there would come to a screeching halt if women just had respect for other women.

Have you ever had another woman disrespect you and your marriage and if so...what, if anything did you do about it?

4 comments:

Leanne said...

When we were in college, my husband [boyfriend at the time] had a female friend at work. One summer when we were apart [he stayed on campus and worked; I went home and worked], he went out a few times with the whole group - her included, and after that, she became very clingy...calling him "Love" as a nickname [he was being silly at work one day and talking in a fake British accent, calling everyone "love" or "gov'nah," and somehow that translated in her calling him "love." Whatever.]

The thing is, she was very unattractive physically, and my husband was not attracted to her at all.

However, she continued to call and invite him out with "the group" even after we were married. He accepted a few times - and brought me along. She came over to "help us clean and paint our new house" when we first bought it, and he had her help me scrub the basement while he worked upstairs.

Strangely enough, she stopped calling him after he'd done this a few times...

Interesting how that works, isn't it? Especially since she claimed to "want to be my friend." Yeah, right.

So to any guys reading this? The fastest way to get an interested woman off your back is to say, "Sure - and my wife would love to join us, too." Chances are, she isn't going to want to stick around...

Anonymous said...

We had only been married about 2 yrs. My husband worked with a woman and infact we knew the couple outside of the work place as well. David came home daily and began to share how they were having problems in their marriage. She bagan making comments to him like "I wish my husband were like you. My husband does ----" The Holy Spirit quickened my spirit. DH just thought she was trying to get some advice but I told him "No she wants you!" He began taking lunch breaks elsewhere and did not have contact. Well then about 2 weeks later, she did not have a ride home. My DH would give you the shirt off his back, very generous. He gave me a call and said what do you think I should do? I said, "What would you want me to do?" He replied, "Tell them No." So he went to the woman and said, "I am a happily married man. You need to call your husband!" That ended that!

You know, Deanna, sometimes, I do not know if husbands have the "radar" that wives do in these situations! I do not know if they always see the "old snake" working his ways, using these women to destroy. What do you think?
Ruth, PA

Anonymous said...

Thank God, I have never had this problem. My husband's always said: "They take one look at my wife and know they don't stand a chance". Isn't that SWEET! But I am not naive enough to rely on that! We've always had healthy boundaries in place to prevent these type of things. A man once bothered me, it was handled in such a convicting way that he ended up calling my dh to apologize! Zero tolerance is the key!

I was just in a minister's meeting and one man spoke up and said: "A man should never tell his wife and should take it to the grave!" Go figure! I could not believe my ears. A Godly African American Bro. spoke out against that comment (as did I). The sad thing to me is that if it got back to a wife in another way, she could emotionally react and there may be a murder! It's happened.

Run from the wayward woman (man)! 2as1

Tami said...

Oh my gosh. I am laughing so hard that you told her you would break her legs. Too funny - but good to hear someone willing to stand up for their marriage! I wouldn't hesitate to do the same.
My husband works 45 minutes away from home - and is very attractive. He talks about me so much that at least so far, no one has even given him a second thought (and, God love him, he totally misses it when women are flirting with him!)(Also not saying your husband didn't talk about you enough!). I hope I never have to deal with what you described - but I would not hesitate to fight for my marriage with everything in me.