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What would you do?

As I was sitting in the waiting room waiting for Larry to come out of his operation yesterday, my doctor and friend, Dr. Rosemay Latortue stopped by. She wanted to see if I knew anything yet about Larry's surgery, and just spend some time talking. So we sat for a long time and finally the conversation rolled around to Africa (which it does frequently, even when I'm not making a trip.) Rosemay feels a real call to help there and minister through both the Word of God and medicine. She goes at least once a year, and stays for up to a month at a time. She just came back from Zambia just a few months ago. When I told her I was going to Africa to preach she was so excited! She shouted, "Oh! You are going to the motherland! You will NEVER be the same!" She has always told me about her adventures in Africa but now I will really understand. She insisted on being my #1 prayer partner and has been praying for this trip for a while now, for God's provision, power and protection. I appreciate her so much. She's also letting me borrow her phone that I'll be able to call home on anytime. (What a blessing!) She's helped me get ready in so many ways.

So today she was talking to me about getting prepared in various ways - I was asking her about my carry on bag (because going through London they don't allow what they do in the U.S. as far as that...rules are different) and I was stressing over what to do about my laptop and all...being that it's basically attached to my hip. And then she says..."you know, each time I go, I have a talk with my children before I leave and prepare them that I may not come back. I let them know I may perish while I am there, and that if I do, they are to realize that it was for a worthy cause and that many have perished for the gospel's sake...and if it happens to me it's an honor..." Then she goes on to tell me that she just thinks it's a good idea to sit down with each of the kids, and tell them all this.


I don't want to do that.

I want to say, "I love you". I want to say, "I'll miss you so much..." just like I do even if I'm just leaving for the weekend to go to Miami. But tell them I might die? That I might not come back? I don't know, it seems kind of "too much" to me, since although people DO die on a missions trip, it's not as often as they live. I mean the odds are that I am not going to die although it does happen. I just don't want to scare them.

I'm not saying Rosemay is wrong by any means, in fact she's a very Godly woman and this is the way God told her to handle it in her household. I just don't know if I want to do it in mine. Know what I mean? Not that she by any means said she thought I had to, it was just a suggestion... and I do respect her suggestions a lot.

What do you think? Should I have this talk with them? Should I not and just trust that everything will be just fine, as I am doing right now?

I mean, hello, I'm not naive to the point of realizing I could die. Actually all of us are dying every day! We are one step closer to coming to an end with our earthly bodies, and closer to eternity every day we wake up. So really everybody is dying. I could die in a car accident in Tampa. I could die on a trip to Miami or Ft. Lauderdale just as well. Terrorists exist there too although I know a lot of people are talking about terrorism in Kenya...still, I could have died in NYC. I could die in my sleep. Every day any of us could die. Should I treat this as different than any other day?

Everything in me just doesn't want to tell them this. Because I really DO believe that this is going to be an incredible trip with many spiritual results and I believe that on November 16, I'm going to fly back into TPA and hug my family and say, "let's go to dinner and get me a fresh brewed iced tea WITH ice!"

What do you think?


Michele said…
PD- Dr Rosemay is so right about going to Africa - you will never be the same- in 1996 I went for 2 weeks to minister to the children of Botswana- my life will never be the same- soak it all in and enjoy every minute of it-I will share it with you sometime -
As far as speaking with the kids- you are right and so is she - I think you need to do what you feel in your heart to tell them-
You may not come back - but you may not arrive home from a driving trip either- God will guide you and protect you- I know he did for us- when we were there-
We had a bomb scare in London- (we had a layover to we went into town) but it was all good- would it keep me from going back- no I want to go so bad back to Africa I can taste it- You will so fall in love with the country and the people- I would go on but this is getting long as it is.
Love you
Unless this was "a word" I don't think I would have this talk. When I leave I do keep in mind that it is possible I might not come back. But I try and think about that every day.
I agree that going to Africa is no more dangerous than going around the corner.
God set your days before you were born. If this is something important, then it should be done everyday.
We say, I love you and I will see you soon. Truth. Would the other not be planting seeds of fear and playing on emotions that need to be secure?
Melissa Davis said…
Pastor Deanna,
I've never been to Africa but have a ministering opportunity in 2008 in Kenya and to be honest I never thought of not returning and neither should you because if God be for you there's no one that can be against you.

Yes, it's possible but one thing I do know there are still too many souls that are waiting to hear only your voice. Dr. Rosemay is right but like you said that's how God used her concerning her family. God will lead you in the way that you should depart from you kids. You need a clear mind to go minister and your kids need a clear mind to keep mom in constant prayer. While in your quiet time with the Lord, He will give you the answer.

Lots of Love, Lady Sutton

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