So today she was talking to me about getting prepared in various ways - I was asking her about my carry on bag (because going through London they don't allow what they do in the U.S. as far as that...rules are different) and I was stressing over what to do about my laptop and all...being that it's basically attached to my hip. And then she says..."you know, each time I go, I have a talk with my children before I leave and prepare them that I may not come back. I let them know I may perish while I am there, and that if I do, they are to realize that it was for a worthy cause and that many have perished for the gospel's sake...and if it happens to me it's an honor..." Then she goes on to tell me that she just thinks it's a good idea to sit down with each of the kids, and tell them all this.
I don't want to do that.
I want to say, "I love you". I want to say, "I'll miss you so much..." just like I do even if I'm just leaving for the weekend to go to Miami. But tell them I might die? That I might not come back? I don't know, it seems kind of "too much" to me, since although people DO die on a missions trip, it's not as often as they live. I mean the odds are that I am not going to die although it does happen. I just don't want to scare them.
I'm not saying Rosemay is wrong by any means, in fact she's a very Godly woman and this is the way God told her to handle it in her household. I just don't know if I want to do it in mine. Know what I mean? Not that she by any means said she thought I had to, it was just a suggestion... and I do respect her suggestions a lot.
What do you think? Should I have this talk with them? Should I not and just trust that everything will be just fine, as I am doing right now?
I mean, hello, I'm not naive to the point of realizing I could die. Actually all of us are dying every day! We are one step closer to coming to an end with our earthly bodies, and closer to eternity every day we wake up. So really everybody is dying. I could die in a car accident in Tampa. I could die on a trip to Miami or Ft. Lauderdale just as well. Terrorists exist there too although I know a lot of people are talking about terrorism in Kenya...still, I could have died in NYC. I could die in my sleep. Every day any of us could die. Should I treat this as different than any other day?
Everything in me just doesn't want to tell them this. Because I really DO believe that this is going to be an incredible trip with many spiritual results and I believe that on November 16, I'm going to fly back into TPA and hug my family and say, "let's go to dinner and get me a fresh brewed iced tea WITH ice!"
What do you think?