Where my heart is
I love my world at 5036 Spectacular Bid Dr.
Savanna got back from Missionette Camp and went straight to Morgan's to spend the night. I do miss her but she seemed to excited to go, so I said yes. The boys worked today and then I took them to lunch, just the three of us to Chic-Fil-A. We talked for a while, then went and got Larry's father's day gift. (shhhhhh...won't tell you what it is in case he reads this before morning).
Today I went past my dream house. It's still for sale after all this time and now they have lowered the price $55,000. Dustin went over and laid hands on it today. I said, "um, son....I don't think Jesus has a problem with this, it's your Dad you have to convince..." Ha ha! Actually buying the house wouldn't be the difficult thing, it would be selling ours since the market is so bad right now. The dream house has been on the market a year now and not sold. There are a zillion for sale signs in my neighborhood, with nothing moving. Oh well, it was just a dream anyway, nothing serious. I'm content where I am. I just like to walk past it and fantasize about it.
A few people have asked me about my car. Some people I don't even know have read my blogs about it and written me to give condolences. (Yes, I'm serious.) We find out Allstate's decision on Monday. But really, I'm okay. I think I've gotten it out of my system. The way I'm wired, I need time to process things, to be in shock a day or two, cry for a while, be angry for a while, talk to at least one friend who understands and say whatever I want to as long as I want to. And then...it's like I'm tuckered out. Done. Right now I am just exhausted from it, and ready to move on. I have so many things at stake right now, so many projects I'm working on, so many dreams in the works...I don't have time to think about the car or other things that might hold me back from focusing my main goals for this year.
I was reading Secrets of the Secret Place today and it talked about how enduring in your intimate relationship with God even through numb places, difficulties, dry spells, etc. will bring you into a closeness with God like you have never imagined. It's interesting. I was out on the patio tonight and didn't read anything in the Word or anything else that was particularly spiritually jolting. Nothing that sent a zinger into my heart. But one thing I did have was a comfortableness...a contentedness to be out there, just communicating with the Lord. I didn't have anything huge to say, and neither did He today but it was simply a comfort level in being together. A few hours later, Larry and I took about a mile walk. Most of the walk, we said nothing. It was just a quiet walk together. Most of the time though, we talk non-stop. Just like days where we sit in the bedroom or jacuzzi and talk a lot or other times, we can just lay still and quiet, reading or watching a movie. There may not be anything super important that we talk about, but there is a comfort in just one another's presence. I have heard it said you know you have a good friend when you can be together and silence is not awkward.
That was what it was like tonight in my devotional time. And I didn't panic or get bored. It was just the way it went tonight - not a formula, but a relationship - the way it should be.