Deanna Doss Shrodes

Larry and Me ~ Vacation in Boston, two years ago   Memorial Day is a day when our family typically stays at home. It's a day to remember those who gave their lives for our freedom in America.  I do remember and honor. Just saying, on this day of remembering our heroes, Larry and I choose to stay home rather than fight the crowds, trying to find a spot for a towel or chair on an overly-crowded beach.  Most people would not guess it but other than the context of work, I'm an introverted, stay-at-home type person at heart. I don't even like to go away for vacation, but make it a priority to do so because it's important to my husband. Larry asked me last week what I wanted to do for Memorial Day. It was no shock to him when I said, "Stay home." "What do you want to do at home?" was his response. I'm surprised he asked because I give the same response every time for 28 years: "Relax."  "What does relaxing look like...

We don't have some things, because we don't ask God for them. James 4 tells us that. I also believe that as we delight ourselves in the Lord, He gives us the desires of our heart. (Psalm 37:4) Sometimes God answers when we don't even ask for the desires of our heart. Perhaps it's because we don't see how God would do it within our current structure. Translation: our current box.   We forget that His ways and His thoughts are higher than ours. (Isaiah 55) He can give us our desires even when it doesn't seem feasible at all. He is truly omniscient. I love that, and so much more about Him.    I'm a homebody at heart. Most would never guess it, but at the core I'm an introvert who could live in my pajamas, with a dog by my side, writing books until Jesus comes back. But  I was convinced   that one day upon retirement I was going spend my days in between pj's and book writing, taking road trips. These jaunts would be for purpose of encouraging le...

The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak. Emotionally, the pull is intense to stay home, reflect and practice self-care. She is sad because she tried to become a mom, and still isn't one. She's grieving over the child she lost. Or the mother she lost.  Or the mother who abandoned or abused her, making this day such a painful reminder of all she never had .   Or she has a toxic mom and responded by drawing healthy boundaries that led to them hardly speaking, or maybe never speaking again.   Whatever the case, the spirit wins out when it comes to this lady. No matter how daunting the situation, she doesn’t give in to the overwhelming urge to hide out until Monday.  She wakes up. She shows up. She makes a difference. Who is she? She's a woman in ministry for whom Mother's Day brings painful reminders or complications. Regardless of her own circumstance, she reaches out in genuine love to minister to God’s people. Notwithst...

Larry and me, on one of our trips to Savannah, GA. I do this, happily. In 2013, my therapist Melissa suggested something radical: stop doing anything you can't agree to do happily.  "Okaaaaaaay... " I retorted," to her suggestion, not even mildly shocked. "Who can afford to exclusively do things that make them happy? Probably not even Donald Trump. I mean, there's just stuff you have to do in life. You gotta do these things to survive. Or you have to do them so the house won't be condemned. Who gets all happy clappy when cleaning the bathroom... except maybe my friend Joanne? What about the things that beg be done? The things that, without my doing them, may literally cause everything to fall apart?” “Only agree to it if you can do it happily,” she maintained. I seriously thought my therapist was whack for a moment.  My world was about to fall apart...I just knew it! I envisioned myself running back to Melissa to fix other proble...

Today I'm interviewing someone who loves cruising more than anyone I know -- and knows how to get fantastic deals! Today my guest is my husband, Larry Shrodes. Enjoy. Deanna: Why do most people think cruises are so expensive?   Larry: Many of us in our generation grew up seeing The Love Boat. I think it may have been thought of by some as more a dream than a reality. Perhaps people think, “Surely this has to be more than I can afford -- not realistic for me…” The reality is, many times you can cruise much cheaper than taking a traditional vacation. However note that there is a difference between a vacation and a trip. For instance, a trip is when you go visit relatives and stay with them. I don’t consider that a vacation.   Deanna: So then, what is a true vacation, to you?   Larry: Vacation is getting away from it all. A true vacation for me means people taking care of me rather than the other way around. It’s a break from my normal routine and respon...

An informal poll I took recently among friends in ministry revealed that most don’t take a day off. Or if they do it’s not a true day off. I’ve known the importance of a Sabbath for a long time. After all it’s in the Bible . And I’m a minister, so I’ve done plenty of reading of the Bible. But for some reason those of us in ministry, myself included, seem to need more of a kick in the pants about taking a Sabbath, even more than our non-clergy counterparts.  Several weeks ago, I was spending time with some women's ministry leaders and brought this up. I was encouraging them about getting proper rest and practicing self-care. I discovered that even on their day off, 99.9% of them check work emails and texts, and “take a moment to answer back real quick.” I suggested to the group that all of those moments taken to “answer back real quick” add up.   I know because I’ve been so guilty of it myself. I also suspect that by answering back, most of us have entire Sabbaths...