Deanna Doss Shrodes

This is Larry and I on our honeymoon in Hawaii, 25 years ago. Look how white I am, even after spending a week there. How did I go to Hawaii and stay this white? It may have had something to do with rarely being out of our hotel room. And look how tired my husband looks! Ha ha! I hope my husband is always a little tired in the right kind of way. Today I want to share with you how you can live a perpetual honeymoon.  Plan for it You'll never achieve what you don't pursue. If you want your marriage to stay hot, plan for it to. Do what it takes to get it there and keep it there. Some people believe this takes all the fun out of it. On the contrary, it lights the spark more.  Prioritize it Women often mention the many roadblocks to romance and sex in their marriage. There are the needs of their children, bills to pay, being tired from working so much, and lots more. The truth is, we often begin to think those things are more important and assign low priority to ...

The following are some tried and true strategies to get close and stay close as a married couple. 1) Have at least one meal a day together. Not rushed. Not in the car, or out of a bag. Sit down and look into one another's eyes and take your time eating and talking about the day to come, or the day you just had. 2) Touch. Not just sexual, but everyday, all-the-time touch. Hold hands. Snuggle if you're watching TV. Gently rub your mate's shoulders when you walk up and ask them how their day was. The photo above is one of my favorites. It's Larry and I this past summer, floating down Rainbow River. We like to hold hands even when we're tubing. :) 3) Talk daily about low points and high points. At the end of every day, ask them: what was the highlight of this day for you? What was the low point of this day for you? 4) Stay close to God.  The closer you get to God the closer you'll get to each other. Christian marriage is like a triangle with God at th...

 My husband and I were making a hospital visit last week on the other side of town. When we were finished we planned to stop for a quick lunch before we went on to two more appointments. He asked me a familiar question: "where do you want to stop?" Many times I crave something specific but on this day, nothing came to mind. I said, "Babe, I could eat anything today. Nothing particular comes to mind. I'll be happy with literally anywhere you pick, so just decide and I'll be fine with whatever." Larry was driving while I continued with some paperwork that was on my lap, glancing down the entire rest of the drive. A few minutes later we ended up in a parking space and the car stopped. I glanced up to see where we were: an Indian buffet.  I looked at Larry and smiled and said, "You love me...so much."  He just said, "yep." Before we even walked into the place I knew it didn't matter what they had on the buffet or on their ala cart...

Recently Larry and I were out on a date. We settled in at the Olive Garden and were enjoying our breadsticks and salad when my cell phone started buzzing incessantly. I should have turned it off beforehand, but I forgot. When looking at the number I noticed it was a client I previously coached. That wasn't strange. Sometimes former clients keep in touch. What was was odd was that they kept calling back every five minutes although they left a message the first time. I began to wonder if they were just butt dialing me but alas, the calls were intentional. A possible dream job opportunity came up and the client wanted me to assist him immediately in preparing for it. The issue was that I had set the time aside for my husband. I quickly sent an email referring him to another certified job coach who was open to help. Instead of respecting that, he continued to call...six more times. With each call he increased the amount he was willing to pay until finally it was topping $600 for ...

Years ago Larry and I brought a youth pastor on staff who couldn't find a house. Rental homes were in short supply in the small town we lived in, so temporarily, we invited their family to move in with us.  No. I. Am. Not. Kidding.  This was their first youth pastorate. They were brand spankin' new in the ministry. At the time we had two kids and so did they. So there were eight of us living in the same home, eight is enough and our house was about 1800 square feet.  We were packed in like sardines but we had some wonderful times. Our families got along splendidly and things like dinner time were especially meaningful. We took turns cooking and we collaborated on other nights and enjoyed great conversations around the table. We played games with the kids. Laundry was interesting...oh my ! But we made the best of what could hav e been an uncomfortable s ituation and  we actually have great memories from that time.  The day it all came to an ...

If you're a Christian single man or woman with a desire to find a Godly spouse, what do you need to know? Above anything else, you must pursue someone who has their priorities straight now. Ask yourself these questions when meeting someone who may be a person of interest: What do they chase now? Who has top priority in their life now? What are their personal standards? Can I see this person being the Godly father or mother of my future son or daughter? Is there evidence of a true walk with God? Have I actually seen/heard them pray/communicate with God? (Big key to intimacy!) And I love this question that Lucretia Noble, wife of Pastor Perry Noble, came up with. A Christian mother who was worried sick about her young adult daughter kept telling me, "I just wish a great Christian guy would come along for "K". Please just join with me in believing for this, for her..." Well, only one problem. K dropped into church occasionally on Sundays but s...

YOUR MARRIAGE! It's the topic for the entire week upcoming, on the blog.   Not married? Awesome. Because several of the posts will be about your possible FUTURE marriage! I aim to prepare you. Specifically, we'll be unpacking the topic of priorities that lead to a successful marriage. I'm going to ask some powerful questions and make some eyebrow raising statements! Get ready, get ready, get ready! Never have I been more passionate about this. It's one reason I'm so excited to be away with my husband this coming week. Today, Larry and I leave for the 25th anniversary cruise we've had planned for a year. When we planned this trip, we weren't aware that the church would be doing something special for us back in June, (on our actual anniversary week) and sending us away for a few days to Club Med , but I'm kinda glad that we didn't know. I didn't realize then how much I'd need to get away right now. What a God-send. The tim...